The Redacted Self

How much of your life is really yours?

The search for autonomy in youth is widespread. Who are you? Where do you fit in the world? What is the world to you? Navigating these questions in a society that is constantly evolving is tough. Sometimes, it feels like you aren’t living in society itself but someone else’s version of it. And being in that space makes you see things so differently to everyone else.

And therein lies the redacted self. You become used to changing parts of you to fit the mould expected, whilst you observe others making strides and wonder if that could be you.

There are so many circumstances and challenges that differentiate situations, but the challenge to be true to who you are will always persist.

If your life was a book, how much of it would be about you and the decisions you made, rather than the choices of others?

The redacted self shrinks as you mould yourself tirelessly, again and again, for concepts and ideas that are outdated. That you have outgrown. That you are bigger than.

So how do you find that autonomy, to increase your story? The first step is to acknowledge and confirm it is happening. The next step is to consciously choose yourself and your future in a society that does not value your worth.

I previously thought the redacted self was weak, useless, a whisper in the dark. Now I realise it may be the most integral part of me daring to imagine a different world.

A world where I can live on my own terms.

Author and a friend in attempts to act differently than expected

*Image is owned by author, all rights reserved 

#theredactedself #identity #redacted #autonomy #independence